Thursday, June 4, 2009

Something about a doctor?

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

Imagine sitting in the doctor's examination room waiting for him or her to come in. You are ailing from some condition or another and you aren't sure what to do. You are hoping that your physician can figure things out, offer you a solution of some kind, and allow your life to get back to its healthy and happy previous condition.

The doctor walks in and says hello. When asked what brings you to the office, you say, "You tell me."

The doctor knows you came because you have some questions or concerns that need to be responded to, but now all of the sudden you've decided not to tell the doctor what your questions or concerns are? You know and I know, and the doctor knows, this is going to take a "full work up" just to even find out what one of possibly many of the symptoms are. Unless you change your attitude and decide to tell your doctor.

Since instead of cooperating with your health management specialist, you've decided to play games, the doctor now has to fish with you to get even close to understanding what your situation is. He or she is going to ask you a litany of questions - some of which actually will seem to have nothing to do with what is troubling you. You can't blame the doctor for this, you obviously came in for a reason and now it's the doctor's job to figure out what that reason is. This isn't going to be easy.

Or let's imagine another situation.

Same doctor. Same room. Except this time you have decided to be a little more a part of the team. At least you can tell the doctor, "I have pain." At least that narrows it down some. "Any particular place?" the doctor asks. You remain tight lipped. You've finished being helpful. So now the doctor has to poke and prod you in every imaginable location! Is that really what you want to pay for?

Let's put this in perspective.

In the first doctor visit, the doctor had to begin with gathering as much of a full history as possible and then give you a complete general examine - or as much of one that was required before you finally said, "ouch, that's where it hurts!"

In the second scenario, the doctor knew he was looking for a physical location of pain and so got to avoid many of the questions and procedures. Straight to the poking and prodding to find out until the spot was hit. Or, in an ideal situation, the doctor walks in and asks the matter and you simply answer as completely as possible - but being sure not to make anything up or give your opinion because you don't want to waste too much time being mistaken. You have a continual dull pain in your left shoulder.

The doctor does some examinations, recognizes that you have a spasmodic muscle in your back just below your neck and shoulder. This could be due to spinal misalignment and the doctor prescribes you some muscle relaxants. "This should ease your discomfort and if your back or neck doesn't re-adjust after this, I might suggest a chiropractor. But sometimes this helps all you need."

The above situations are a lot like what I encounter as a tarot reader here on Keen. Some clients will call and ask for a general reading. That's not a bad idea, actually. It's a good idea every now and then to get a full "physical examine" to help you determine if you are neglecting any important health concerns you haven't yet become aware of. You know what they say: an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. But suppose it's time for that pound of cure... do you really want to continue longer in your discomfort by making your tarot reader pull your teeth before discovering that your main pain is in your heart?

When you visit with your tarot reader or psychic, it's okay to tell them what you want to know about. You can say anything from "I'm interested in finding out about my relationship with my boyfriend" or "What does so-and-so really want from me in this relationship?" And it's okay to know that too much information is not a good thing because some times giving the information can influence the reading in ways that might be counter productive to your success. It's a fine line honestly.

But don't be afraid if your reader has questions they want to ask you. This is not cheating, it's clarification. "Do you still live with your mother, or what's this issue I see that involves your home? These could be the same thing here. Any ideas?" That's not an unfair question. Or, "Are you two apart? How long has it been because I'm really getting a weak sense with this distance between you." That's actually a question I asked that ended up leading toward the woman deciding I was a fraud and she left me very negative feedback. Not to mention that my reading was the only one she'd received in months of visiting with different readers and asking the same question of them that was different than all the rest.

To get the most of your reading it actually helps to have an open and honest discussion with your advisor. Although of course it is true in any industry, be it medical, retail, or psychic services, that there are people who are not honest in what they have to offer you or are downright incompetent in what they do, it is rarely helpful to begin with the cynical attitude that you are purposely looking to "out" the phonies. Instead, give it a try with a comfortable and relaxed attitude. Assume the best and see where the reading actually goes from there before you decide if it is working for you or not. And also, especially if it involved predictions about the future which you currently can't imagine coming true, give it some time before you completely decide to form an opinion.

As much as I like receiving the feedback for what I do, I'm more interested in an honest rating based on the reading that was given and not your immediate feelings at the moment the call ended. And as much as anyone likes getting five out of five stars, a conscientiously written statement is much more valuable no matter how many stars are attached to it. In other words, for me, a three or four star rating with some words of encouragement and expressions explaining where things worked or didn't work is much more than a five star rating and simple "ty."

In my next blog, I think I'll continue the doctor metaphor and discuss second opinions. :-)

Love is the law, love under will.

- Darin